TALK & SILENCE
Many victim-survivors of violence and abuse are silent or are silenced. We invite you to read the reflection booklet 'Talk', the 'Talk and Silence' insights and the reflection booklet 'Fear'.
Silence, Talk & Silenced
SILENCE: "Less than 40 per cent of the women who experience violence seek help of any sort.”
[UN Women]
TALK: "In the majority of countries with available data on this issue, among women who do seek help, most look to family and friends and very few look to formal institutions, such as police and health services. Fewer than 10 per cent of those seeking help reported to the police.”
[UN Women]
SILENCED: Many victim-survivors are silenced by the violence and abuse used against them and by unhelpful and harmful responses in society, services and systems.
'Talk' (Booklet)
We invite you to read 'Talk' - a reflection resource designed to reveal and value the strategic considerations of victim-survivors when deciding if, when and how to tell someone about experiences of violence and abuse.
"Responses don’t ‘start’ when someone ‘tells’ us something. We have been responding all along (directly or indirectly) through our stance, our silence, our action or inaction about violence and abuse. We are responders even when nothing is told to us." [Talk]
'Talk & Silence' (Lightbox)
We invite you to explore the intentional ways in which language and silences are used and mis-used to build on or undermine safety, dignity and justice.
Open the 'Talk and Silences' lightbox in full screen by clicking on the first tile in the lightbox below - the pages will show in full screen. (This lightbox includes embedded animation 'Our Responses').
![SILENCE - "Less than 40 per cent of the women who experience violence seek help of any sort.” [UN Women]. TALK - "In the majority of countries with available data on this issue, among women who do seek help, most look to family and friends and very few look to formal institutions, such as police and health services. Fewer than 10 per cent of those seeking help reported to the police.” [UN Women]. SILENCED - Many victim-survivors are silenced by the violence and abuse used against them and by unhelpful and harmful responses in society, services and systems.](https://www.insightexchange.net/wp-content/uploads/2025/06/Talk-and-Silence-P-2-1024x768.png "Talk and Silence P (2)")
![Many victim-survivors of violence and abuse are silent or are silenced. We invite you to explore the intentional ways in which language and silences are used and mis-used to build on or undermine safety, dignity and justice. ‘Just because it doesn’t fit into words, doesn’t mean its not important. Just because I haven’t talked about it …doesn’t mean it's not a problem for me or something I hold concern about. Just because it doesn’t make sense to you, or not in your experience, doesn’t mean it doesn’t matter.’ [Excerpt: Follow My Meaning]](https://www.insightexchange.net/wp-content/uploads/2025/06/Talk-and-Silence-P-3-1024x768.png "Talk and Silence P (3)")
![Soundwave image. “His hands eventually unraveled from around my neck and in this fragile moment, I did a rag-doll-slip to the floor. He walked away, no words exchanged, no explanation, no apology - never ever to be discussed. I am not sure how he felt in the moment, gallant, unburdened of anger, or just satisfied with the realignment of authority” Excerpt from the Strangulation Collection | Adeline] www.insightexchange.net/strangulation/ "The privatisation of violence is not accidental. When I dared to reveal my experiences, I was met with shame: 'You're just seeking attention. You have no injuries. You're exaggerating.' That taught me never to speak of it again." RL-ESP-023 [Responders Lab – Participant response]](https://www.insightexchange.net/wp-content/uploads/2025/06/Talk-and-Silence-P-5-1024x768.png "Talk and Silence P (5)")
![“I'm not comfortable using that word [pause] because… if it was rape, where does it leave me and our relationship? I mean, he is not a rapist. No, that word scares me and nothing ‘bad’ bad has happened, so no, I wouldn’t call it that.” Sara [Ref 1] [Excerpt: Intimate Dignity] www.insightexchange.net/my-dignity/ Scan the static QR code to open the My Dignity landing page. (Website has a quick-exit button)](https://www.insightexchange.net/wp-content/uploads/2025/06/Talk-and-Silence-P-6-1024x768.png "Talk and Silence P (6)")
![MORE INSIGHTS - We invite you to explore more examples of the intentional ways in which language and silences are used and mis-used to build on or undermine safety, dignity and justice. - Voices of Insight - Voices about economic abuse - Voices of experience www.insightexchange.net/listening 'Our Responses - We cannot guess or assume when responding to violence and abuse. Talking and silences are directly tied to meaning making and dignity. We all strategically choose how and when we talk or stay silent, and who to. [Excerpt: Our Responses] We invite you to view/share/embed Our Responses (7:45 mins) [https://vimeo.com/968479205] Using your phone, you can scan the static QR Code to open the animation on the Responders Lab page or view it on the next slide. www.insightexchange.net/responders-lab](https://www.insightexchange.net/wp-content/uploads/2025/06/Talk-and-Silence-P-9-1024x768.png "Talk and Silence P (9)")
'Fear' (Booklet)
We invite you to read the booklet Fear. As responders we can better understand victim-survivors many reasons to fear, when we explore what victim-survivors are having to do, not do, give up and go without to be able to survive and lead their lives.
"‘Fear’ is typically understood to be a key measure of the likely harm the perpetrator will cause. Yet, the absence of ‘obvious’ fear, is wrongly and uncritically assumed to mean the absence of threat and risk of harm. Understanding and valuing victim-survivors’ lived expertise and their specific reasons to fear, informs and improves the quality of our responses." [Fear]
We invite you to explore 'Quiet Questions. Silenced Thoughts' This booklet is not for everyone but may be really important to someone.